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Who the Hell Is She?

"Why are you trying so hard to fit in, when you were born to stand out?" -Ian What a Girl Wants

Standing out has never been difficult for me. At the risk of sounding redundant, fitting in has ALWAYS been difficult for me. I've lived a lot of different types of lives, but never one for very long. (Not in order) I've been a military wife, a mixed martial arts school owner, an architecture student at a prestigious university, a project manager at an architecture firm in Manhattan, homeless, a foster child, a candidate to become a foster parent, a ski instructor, a stripper, and most recently, a comedian. I've been a liar, a con artist, a best friend, a rescuer, an abuser, a student, a teacher, a nanny, a mother, a wife, a whore, a daughter, a loner, a cheater, a selfish bitch, and a selfless saint.

Two things have always remained consistent. I've always tried to live up to the morals and standards my late father taught me in my eleven years with him, and I've always tried to be a good sister to my brother, who is my best friend.

What I am trying to do with my comedy is build a brand, and teach people about this bizarre, empowering, sometimes scary, sometimes gross, sometimes fun, and ALWAYS lucrative lifestyle I've chosen for myself. I began stripping in Fort Lauderdale in April of 2014 when I was 25 years old. The decision I made for myself was certainly not the right decision for everyone, but I can candidly say it's the best decision I have ever made. Stripping has given me freedom, confidence, and empowerment. Because of stripping I've been able to afford to live in some of the most expensive places in the country. I've been able to take care of my family, travel around the world, and better myself with classes and experiences.

For anyone who might be reading this, wondering if stripping is the right path for you, all I can say is, you need to dig deep and ask yourself who you really are. There isn't one correct answer. As a stripper, you will be ostracized. Family and friends will turn their backs. It will be really, really hard to find a man of quality who will be accepting of your choice of employment. Daily you will be offered every drug, and every drink, and every amount of money under the sun to do things you might not have ever even considered. You'll be surrounded by a group of peers who are doing things you might not have ever considered.

One of the things I will definitely cover in these blogs, though not in this one, is my distain for prostitution. I want to be clear that there are MANY strippers who have never prostituted themselves, and that no matter what a person wants to call themselves, if you exchange sexual favors for money, goods, or services, you are a prostitute. Sexual favors include kissing, touching a person's genitals, and never actually following through with committing a sexual act, but stating that one may take place. This is definitely a topic I will expand on in the future. I just wanted to touch on it really quickly to clear the air. There is NO good reason to sell your health, safety, or mental well being.

Getting back to my comedy though, I've been stripping for (in the world of stripping) a pretty long time. I'd be considered a veteran stripper. I've seen some really crazy things. My opinions about sociology and psychology have been shaped by some of the lowest human behavior imaginable. I've heard girls say appallingly uneducated things. I know pimps, prostitutes of all different levels, drug addicts, doctors, priests, rabbis, orthodox and hassidic Jews, business owners, professional athletes, husbands, fathers, etc. who partake in different roles in this underground and taboo world. I want my comedy to be a conduit for this insanity.

Did any of this answer who I am? Or am I still trying to figure it out myself?

Hopefully I've piqued your interest, and you'll come back to read my next post.

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